Wednesday, July 30, 2008

July 30, 2008

So I am all emotional (on the inside but still) and a little anxious. Saturday is August 2. 10 years since my first daughter was born.

My weekend is slammed busy. In fact, starting this evening we have lots of stuff going on, over lapping activities and it kinda makes me mad. I want the 2nd to be more sacred. Not sandwiched between agabazillion other commitments.

Would we make a big deal out of Rya hitting double digits? Would her black hair be long like Adrian's or short like the other girls? Would her beauty bring tears to my eyes like her absent does?

Her life changed me. Her death changed me more. And I am greatful. I would never want to take paradise from her to satisfy my curiosity. I would not give up the life lessons I learned to have her back. Rya's death lead to my promise of eternal life. Our loss will be her gain as one day our entire family will join her to abide where Love reigns.

Rya gave me purpose. She gave me definition. She gave me dreams and smiles and hope. She taught me love that showed me a pain so deep and complete I began to need a Savior. She melted my frozen heart to the point it could finally be molded.

Jesus said in John 16:22 you have sorrow now but I will see you again; then you will rejoice and no one can rob you of that joy. I believe in the Word of God; help my unbelief.

2 comments:

Kevin Davis said...

Thanks for the vote - http://tinyurl.com/5w4uor

Amy said...

I'm happy that you wore the ring :) I have been at the beach and my laptop died before I went, so I didn't get your message until we were home. I thought of you--I still cannot believe that it's been ten years for either of us. Bittersweet as it is, I thank God for the baby he gave me for only a short while...and I know you do, too. I'm glad they have changed our lives, and I'm glad to call you my friend because of it. Love you! Praise God for Rya & Jacob!